Digital Cog

Dawn of War II Battle Report 1

I played an awesome game of Dawn of War II with my friend Terran today. While we’re both pretty bad at it, our opponents were of a similar skill level to us so it turned out to be an epic battle. Those of you that have the game can get the replay here. Click on pics for 1080P goodness.

I play Eldar with the Farseer hero, while Terran plays Space Marines with the Force Commander. I was lucky enough to get my hands on a Seer Council, henceforth referred to as “The Rape Train”, by the middle part of the battle. They look so awesome.

Terran got terminator armour and lightning claws for his Force Commander. Almost impossible to kill and he shreds anything that gets too close.

And the rest of his army didn’t look half bad either:

We were up against a Chaos player using a Chaos Lord and an Ork player using a Warboss. I spent alot of my time fighting the Chaos guy and things were going well enough until he let loose one of those ridiculous IMBA horse things on me:

Meanwhile Terran’s force commander was facing off against the Ork Warboss and a squad of Nobs. You can see the Warboss land a fairly brutal blow on the Force Commander in the first pic.

My Wraithguards landed some awesome shots, they can be insanely effective against anything that stands still.

Terran’s Force Commander gives my wounded Farseer a hand up (the awesome thing about DoW II is that this is what is actually happening, heroes can revive each other):

A predator with a twin-linked lascannon and a devastator squad with a regular lascannon unleash their fury on the Ork Warboss at the same time:

Seconds later Terran’s Force Commander teleports in to meet the Warboss in close combat:

As the Force Commander and Warboss duel in the background, my Farseer and squad of Banshees do battle with the Orks:

Some time later, Terran’s Assault squad launch themselves into the air to close the distance between themselves and an Ork tank:

Just as they land in front of the tank, a lascannon devastator squad scores a direct hit on the tank:

But the tank responds with a most brutal salvo:

With the green tide swelling to insurmountable numbers…

I was left with no choice but to summon an Avatar of Khaine!

He proceeded to skewer a load of Orks with that massive sword:

Also used his ground pounding line of explosion ability to great effect:

A duel with the Warboss:

My Farseer uses her gravity blade to levitate some Orks while the rest of my troops pound them:

Just when I thought we had the enemy entirely dominated, the Chaos player managed to get a Great Unclean One. This creature is even more powerful than the Avatar, so I was shitting myself when it waded into the fray.

However, thanks to the inspirational effect that the Avatar had on those around him (30% more damage dealt, 30% less received), the combined might of The Rape Train, Banshees, Farseer and Avatar, along with the timely arrival of the Force Commander ensured victory over this most faul spawn of Nurgle.

I must say that was one of the best battles of Dawn of War II I’ve had in some time.

Month old plant update

So around a month ago I investigated the ravaging effects of a fairly brutal winter on my previously documented Alliums and also started some stuff for this year. I didn’t get around to writing about it but here it is a month or so late. Only one of the garlics that was planted in the winter managed to stay in good condition.

The guy that got bitten in half by some feral creature is barely clinging to life, with his lesser half having succumbed to his brutal injuries and is now nowhere to be seen.

I put three red onions into the ground that I bought in a shop on the off chance they might send up a flower stalk and get me some seeds this year. As onions take 2 years to go from seed to seed, these could save me a year if they flower this summer.

Meanwhile out the back, another garlic clings to life. I’m not sure what the plant that resembles a garlic to the left is. Might as well let it grow and see what happens.

The leek that tried to flower was beaten down and collapsed in failure over the winter. Some green still left on him but overall a pretty dead looking entity. He may rise like a phoenix this summer for another flowering attempt so I’ll let him be for now.

One of the onions that overwintered sent out some shoots, but after being hit with a hard cold spell it seems to have halted growth for now. No sign of life from his friend. I stuck another red onion in with these two, in the hope that if they flowered together I could cross them and get some hybrid seed. Again, not looking so good at the moment.

The mysterious garlic that died and was reborn twice last summer still seems to have some life in him. I wouldn’t put it past this guy to do some mad crazy shit this summer, so I’m cautiously optimistic.

After germinating some japonica rice and some onion seeds I left them out on the garden table in a good location for getting sun. However, I woke one morning to a scene of horrific destruction.

It seems a load of birds swooped down and tore the place up, feasting on the rice and onion seedlings!

Not an onion or rice survived! Such savagery. Since this attack I’ve restarted these and also started many others, and I haven’t made the same mistake of giving the birds the opportunity to have their way with them. After the attack I spotted this war criminal surveying the destruction he no doubt bankrolled if not actively participated in:

He may look like a most civilised gentleman, with his top hat and monocle, but the red war paint donning his chest gives away his true nature as a man of the hunt! He yearns to brazenly swoop through the fields snatching seedlings and worms from their homes and inflicting the most brutal and shocking deaths upon them. Were it not for his privileged upbringing he would soon be frequenting the local tavern, warbling with the common folk and making the most offensive of slurs about the female robins. Thankfully his need to save face saves us from the greatest of his boorism.

Anyway, that was the state of affairs around a month ago. I’ve made significant progress with this years crop so I shall document that soon.

Unilateral adoption of the Japanese Yen

Recently I gained a somewhat more accurate understanding of the monetary system. Thus I became instantly terrified that the Eurozone, without a spender of last resort, was going to strangle itself trying to force fiscal austerity on a set of economies some of which are mired in the most brutal of balance sheet recessions. While a demand collapse actually implies related deflation which would increase the individual purchasing power of a Euro quanta, as this collapse progresses the real economy’s output and long term growth prospects will collapse with it. I imagine that this would kill any speculative desire to hold the Euro (because of a dearth in Euro-denominated useful investments and because the ECB would likely be less willing to raise rates as the whole machine falls apart which will send the hot money elsewhere (or further still a carry trade funded in Euro might develop)). Also on a purchasing power parity basis the Euro is still looking moderately overvalued and since I was planning on converting my Euro denominated savings into Yen within the next 6 months to a year in any case, I decided to jump ship a bit early.

In the true spirit of 1929 I waded fourth into the money market crying “Sell!! Sell!!!” waving about liabilities of the ECB at any financier who looked like they might have some liabilities of the BoJ. Unfortunately while I was eager for the drama, role play and spirit of the markets I was abruptly brought back to the dull reality when the banks I rang universally stated they required at least a week to get their hands on some Yen. So I waited the first week in terror that the Eurozone would collapse before I could get out. When I arrived into the financial institution (bankrupt on paper as they gave people loans to buy houses), they informed me that they hadn’t been able to secure all the Yen that I requested. This was horribly inconvenient, but fed into my already massive ego as it would seem that even the international capital markets could not cope with my speculative excesses. Nay, it was not that the market could not cope, for I realised it then, I was the market! Who do you think lends to 白川様 when a sturkín gets stuck in his printing press!? Never thought about that did you.

So I was handed a massive load of Bank of Japan notes. This silly financial institution had got most of their order in 1000 Yen notes. What utter folly! There are 3 larger denominations which can fit far more purchasing power in the same space. Having such a huge stack of notes gives me a false sense of security, as given the small purchasing power of 1000 Yen I will quickly run this pile down when it has to actually be spent. Nevertheless, the sheer amount of them gives me command of most of the world economy. There was also some 5000 and 10000 notes so it wasn’t all completely ridiculous.

I had to wait another week before I could finally dump the last chunk of my Euro denominated savings on an exhausted and demoralised international monetary system. Luckily this time I was presented with 10000 Yen notes, the financial institution finally doing something that didn’t end up in complete failure and wealth annihilation.

When I finally got around to counting my hoard, I was in for a pleasant surprise.

Two series D 1000 Yen notes! These were suspended in 2004 to make way for Series E, but there’s still some in circulation and they are legal tender, only shredded and replaced if they end up back at the BoJ. I’ll be sure to spend these first in Japan, so that they can continue their heroic service as a store of purchasing power and transacting goodness. This reminds me of when I got a really old 5 Yen coin (minted in 1949 I believe) that used the old kanji for country (國 instead of 国) in change from a shop in Sapporo. I brought it back to Ireland with me and then washed it vigorously with various cleaning solvents and then scraped the remaining dirt/tarnish off it using an pointed implement. Then the next time I returned to Japan I spent it in a shop and hoped that with the reinvigoration I had given it it would serve as a store of purchasing power for another 58 years. Perhaps then another will again restore it to its full glory and it could continue its beautiful existence.

I still have some worthless scrip lying around so I decided to let it bask in the glory of being in the same picture as the Yen:

DJ SHARPNEL

I found a load of awesome stuff like that tune I posted a few days ago so rather than uploading individual ones I thought I’d just post a torrent that I found with a load of the stuff in it. Alot of what’s in this I don’t particularly like myself but there’s some real gems too.

Particularly:
Follow You
Negimaniax
Sound of SOS
Spirits of Rebel Army
Flower Forever

I haven’t gone through it all yet so there might be more good stuff.

絶望先生

At the kind suggestion of a reader I watched the first series of 絶望先生 (despairing teacher).　The main character is a kimono wearing school teacher who so despairs at various aspects of life that he repeatedly tries to kill himself. There are many ironic references to Japanese culture and stylistically it feels very 和風　(literally translates as “Japanese style”, kind of difficult to describe…). One gets that sort of falling cherry blossom, beautiful-yet-forlorn instant feeling alot when watching this, but it is all used as ammunition for various gags and humour centred on different aspects of Japanese culture. The “format” often used involves the main character stringing together a series of assertions and suddenly hitting a realisation, at which point he shouts 「絶望した！」　(“I’ve despaired!”). His students provide ample scope to hit on various themes, with each of them having particular quirks, with one of them being special because she is “normal”.

To get many of the things requires alot of knowledge of Japanese mentality and customs, so there was alot that went over my head. But sometimes the stuff that I “got” I found really hilarious or could emphasise strongly with. One thing I found particularly funny (though needless to say describing it doesn’t make it sound funny at all…) was a scene where one of the girls in the main character’s class goes to see a doctor. The doctor is the main character’s brother and looks just like him. So she says 「先生！」 (“Teacher!”), but in Japan when one goes to see the Doctor it is proper etiquette to also refer to him as 「先生」　so he just responds with 「はい」　(“Yes?”). Then the girl says 「そうじゃなくて、先生！」 (“No not that, teacher!”) with “that” referring to the custom of calling the Doctor “Teacher” in Japanese. But he doesn’t understand and just responds the same. I can’t say exactly what I found so funny about it, it’s difficult to describe properly, but it was one of many scenes that made great use of irony in regards to cultural practices.

In the last episode there is a girl who is so paranoid about her presence or actions disturbing others that she is constantly apologising and hesitating about doing anything. I was embarrassed that I really emphasised with this. In Japan I sometimes feel reluctant to enter a shop, because I don’t want to trouble the staff who might feel bothered by my actions. This is especially the case where I don’t intend to buy anything. Also I sometimes feel quite bad about possibly making people feel uncomfortable by my presence, as one look at my face clearly identifies me as a Gaijin, which might make some Japanese people feel uncomfortable because on average Gaijin are much more violent and dangerous than the average Japanese and are often either ignorant of or knowingly trample all over public etiquette which makes Japanese people feel very uncomfortable. So even though I know that I am not like the average Gaijin, without talking to each and every Japanese person around me, it’s impossible for them to know that so my presence will be troubling alot of them, making me feel somewhat guilty for the disruption in harmony that my existence is causing. This type of behaviour was parodied extremely well to much humorous conclusion in the last episode, with people getting caught in a taking responsibility cycle, where each asserts that they are fully to blame for some perceived negative outcome or transgression.

There are two more series of this and some OVA’s to watch (evidently quite popular in Japan) and it seems to have been adapted from a Manga series. In fact I vaguely recall looking at them in a shop the last time I was in Japan and wondering whether it was my type of thing or not. It’d probably be a bit more difficult reading rather than watching, but might be interesting none the less.